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ENCHANTÉ – PRESIDENT TRUMP – “DO ME A FAVOR”

The Friends are back in the Hullahoo bar talking about the events of the day. Lots of yelling.

Tom: “I think Stone Sour should be impeached!”

Frank: “Yeah, impeach, impeach! I believe they performed it first in Moskou, ha!”

Melissa: “Yeah, ‘So Do Me A Favor, There is no Savior,’ or something like that, and that in Russia Russia, highly impeachable!”

Maria: “And what about the Arctic Monkeys, ‘Do me a favor, and ask me if you need some help!'”

Cindy: “I have a better one from the Riverdale Cast, ‘Do me a favor, say Okay, do me a favor, make them pay!'”

Ted: “And then to think we pay those people in Congress who have nothing else to do but impeach. At least those bands earn their own money.”

Fred: “Do me a favor, Melissa, and hand me that pepper mill for my Bloody Mary, please.”

Melissa: “Any ulterior motives if I don’t? You won’t pay for my drink?”

Fred: “Like that Fats Waller song, ‘Do me a favor, marry me, share my lot.’

Melissa: “You see, you’re a savage, Fred!”

Fred: “Oh, come on, Melissa, even Paul McCartney sang, ‘Somebody’s knocking on the door, so do me a favor and let them in’.”

Ted: “Sounds like the left-wing immigration policy.”

Tom: “Do me a favor, guys, and ask the Treasury to stop paying congressional salaries until they do some work!”

Frank: “That’s quid pro quo, buddy, and you’ll be impeached for that!”

Cindy: “No, Tom is right. I will ask Pelosi, ‘Do me a favor and send people to remove that poop from my doorstep!'”

Fred: “Do me a favor, Cindy, let’s keep this civil. I’m having a Frankfurter with my drink.”

Marlene: “I’m sure everybody in Russia, China, Ukraine, Iran, and whatever dictatorship is having a good laugh about the stupid American democracy.”

Maria: “Right. I don’t think Democratic Party is synonymous with Democracy. Like Russia, they want to jail everybody.”

Marlene: “Is the Republican Party any better? They impeached Clinton.”

Cindy: “Clinton committed felonies and lied under oath, and lost his license to practice law.”

Frank: “And what did Trump do? Asking help to disguise the culprits of the 2016 election Russia Hoax in Ukraine, cough up the secret Hillary server and open up on the Biden corruption, all things that are already under investigation. There was no quid pro quo like with Biden.”

Maria: “And that’s what he said he’d do if he was elected, and he was. He got a mandate for that.”

Frank: “The Democrats only want payback. Tit for Tat, simple as that!”

Tom: “The whole matter sounds like ‘J’accuse‘ in that Dreyfuss affair in France, which started with a spy rummaging through a wastebasket and proved unfounded after years of turmoil. History repeats itself.”

Maria: “That whistleblower does not seem to be a whistleblower at all but an orchestrated internal Whitehouse trap set by people who hate Trump. It’s CIA stuff, by those dejected old spies that have now CNN jobs.”

Cindy: “I remember from my history class that the Dreyfuss affair caused major damage to the French justice system, and  I bet this impeachment case would damage our justice system too.”

Tom: “It already has. That German wisecrack Otto von Bismarck said ‘Politics is the Art of the Possible,” but there’s nothing artful in this impeachment thing. It’s undermining America. Let we the people vote these nincompoops out in a year from now.”

“Hear, hear!” everybody yells and lifts their glasses.

Credits on Lyrics: www.Lyrics.com

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Francine: Dazzling Daughter of the Mountain State 1st Edition

ISBN-13: 978-0999154410
ISBN-10: 099915441
Francine Boyers, a bright and beautiful young West Virginian with a mining degree from Morgantown, is hired by Jim O’Hara, CEO of OHARA, a West Virginian Mining company based in New York. As the CEO’s personal assistant, battling for the West Virginian miners, she proves to be unusually quick on her feet and rises through the ranks to Vice President with astonishing speed, but finds herself enmeshed in a corporate conspiracy. Will she save the West Virginian miners and find love?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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ENCHANTÉ – DORIAN – CHANGE THE CLIMATE!

 

The Hullahoo Bar friends are reuniting after the holidays for their Labor Day Drink, starting with the hottest subject of the day.

“I say ‘No to Climate Change’ but ‘Change the Climate,’ Frank starts. “I want to stop the sun from turning back on June 21. Already it’s going dark.”

“And stop the hurricanes,” Fred adds. “They all come from Africa. Terrorists must be brewing them in the Sahara.”

“The President was overheard saying ‘Nuke them’,” Melissa says, smirking.

“That’s been tried before,” Tom says. “Navy planes started it in the 1950s. As of the sixties they flew into hurricane eyes and spread the walls with silver iodide. They called it ‘Project Stormfury’.”

Credits: Photo: NOAA – U.S. National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, NOAA Photo Library  – Text Project Stormfury: Richard Schwartz – “Great Hurricanes of the South East Coast” – work in progress. See also Rick Schwartz https://www.amazon.com/Hurricanes-Middle-Atlantic-States-Schwartz/dp/0978628004

“Sorry, Tom,” Mary interjects, “but I wasn’t good at chemistry in high school.  What’s that stuff?”

“A yellow powder that makes rain,” Tom explains. “They did it with Hurricane Beula in 1963. The eyewalls began to fall apart and the winds fell by twenty percent.”

“So why aren’t they doing that today?” Cindy asked.

“Because Cuba’s Fidel Castro complained in 1963 that the U.S. weaponized the hurricanes to hit them,” Tom says. “And when they tried it in the Pacific in the seventies, China made a similar complaint. So ‘Project Stormfury’ ended in the eighties after millions spent. But the Hurricane Research Division in Miami is continuing research with planes that fly into the eyes, as they did with ‘Katrina’.”

“At what cost?” Cindy asked.

“In the order of twelve million a year,” Tom answers. “But that may also include other things. I’m sure they’re in Dorian already.”

“Well, given today’s billions of trade wars with China, they should start that again in the Pacific. Cheaper than fighting with tariffs,” Fred opines.

“But what help is this research?” wonders Ted. “It still doesn’t stop these hurricanes once they’re in the air. We must stop them from flying off in the Sahara. It’s terrorism, stupid.”

“Plant trees in the Sahara,” Melissa suggests. “Trees make clouds and rain. Drill for water in those dried-up lake beds they discovered instead of oil.”

“Who owns the Sahara?” Mary asks, scoffing. “Some eight countries if I remember well, all troublesome and full of terrorists. Good luck with your project.”

“Suppose we send Bernie and Pocahontas with their climate plans to the terrorists?” Fred offers. “Maybe they can persuade them with Democrat money to plant trees instead of bombing us.”

“It’s that copper bully in the sky that pulls earth’s orbit closer to its chest,” Frank claims. “Ever had a sunburn at the beach? Well, in a few years we’ll all get scorched. We must steer Mother Earth away from Bully The Sun.”

“Do these Green Deal people know who steers Earth?” Cindy asks. “It looks we’re heading for a big collision the way you describe it. The Bible says somewhere that the elements of earth will be destroyed by fire.”

“Right, we better find out how to steer Earth,” Mary says. “You see what happens with these driverless cars. They run into people and street lights, causing fire.”

“That’s exactly what that Green Deal does,” says Frank. “And they’re not insured.”

“I have a better idea,” Fred says. “Let’s turn these hurricanes back to Africa. That’s what those Green Deal people should put their trillions on. Let them drop all that water on the Sahara instead and plant trees.”

“AOC!” Mary suggests. “Stands for ‘Assault Our Climate.’ Let’s start breezing hard to blow Dorian away from the coast and back to where it came from.”

“That’s racist!” Melissa hollered.

“So is my Bourbon,” yells Frank. “Cheers!”

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Francine: Dazzling Daughter of the Mountain State 1st Edition

ISBN-13: 978-0999154410
ISBN-10: 099915441
Francine Boyers, a bright and beautiful young West Virginian with a mining degree from Morgantown, is hired by Jim O’Hara, CEO of OHARA, a West Virginian Mining company based in New York. As the CEO’s personal assistant, battling for the West Virginian miners, she proves to be unusually quick on her feet and rises through the ranks to Vice President with astonishing speed, but finds herself enmeshed in a corporate conspiracy. Will she save the West Virginian miners and find love?

 

 

 

 

 

Comments

ENCHANTÉ – JOE BIDEN INTERVIEW

 

Mars Man is back on Mother Earth on vacation with Kathryn and they use the opportunity to interview Joe Biden for Mars City TV. The interview is posted here.

Mars: “Helloo Joe, nice to meet you again. You know Kathryn, don’t you? It’s good to see you’re holding strong in your campaign despite the onslaught of bad media coverage.”

Joe: “Thanks, Mars and Kathryn. Well, you know that Joe Biden chooses truth over facts, ha, ha, ha.”

Mars: “Yes, we heard. You must be relieved that China’s Province America locked Mr. Trump and his consorts up in Guantanamo Bay.”

Joe: “I worked hard on that when I was Vice President with Barack America. They don’t call me ‘Joe China’ for nothing. Barack wanted to close it, but the Republicans did not. Now they taste the bitter fruits of their utter partisanship.”

Mars: “Lu Kung Si, the Chinese Governor of Province America, told us they allow local politicians to run for office. But what can you do if China mends the store?”

Joe:  “Let’s just be smart this time. I’m looking for smart.”

Kathryn: “I’m from Nebraska, the only American free state left after China turned the U.S. into Province America. All your contestants for President are running to the left, some even more left than China’s  Communist Party.”

Joe: “But at least there’s some civility now.”

Kathryn: “What would you do as President of China’s Province America if China invades Nebraska and commits another Tiananmen square bloodbath in Omaha?”

Joe: “China has taken America back to normal. We are no longer chest-thumping and doing twitter tantrums. China will treat Nebraska like Hongkong, one country two systems.”

Mars: “But you had considerable financial interests in China and the Bank of China invested a billion dollars in a fund set up by your son and a son of the Heinz fortune while you were Vice President. How much of that went into your own bank account?”

Joe: “I am not responsible for what others do. I thought the deal was when you went to work for the Government, you weren’t supposed to make money! I was kind of secretly hoping one of my kids would go out and make a million bucks, so that when they put me in a home, at least I’ll have a window with a view.”

Mars: “But how can you then be neutral in what China does with Province America?”

Joe: “I won’t, but Trump undermined our democratic alliances while embracing dictators who appeal to his vanity. The world sees Trump for what he was – insincere, ill-informed, impulsive, and corrupt.”

Kathryn: “But is that not exactly what you were with China, corrupt? Is that not the reason why China lets you run for President of Province America?”

Joe: “It proves that I know how to deal with China. China is now eating our lunch, and we work for them. Nowhere it is written there must be a conflict between what was the United States of America and China.”

Kathryn: “You said in the past that China was not our competitor and see now what happened. How can Nebraska be assured that China will apply the same ‘one country two systems’ policy for Hongkong to Nebraska?”

Joe: “As President of Province America I won’t be responsible for foreign policy. President Ping is. In my heart I know Ping’s a good President. No nation should stoke instability in its neighbor’s country.”

Mars: “Don’t you feel disappointed that Province America is destroying the individual freedom and innovation that made America great?”

Joe: “For too long in this society, we have celebrated unrestrained individualism over common community.”

Mars: “There are reports that President Trump is buying Greenland from Denmark to establish a U.S. Government in exile and win America back. Have you heard about that?”

Joe: “Look folks, we know who built this country and we know who’s going to rebuild it. It’s China. Instead of vilifying China we should be thanking China. We owe China.”

Kathryn: “One last question: Did you ever inappropriately touch Chinese women?”

Joe: “Who said that women always want to have the last word? I only want to connect with people!”

Credits: Many websites with Joe Biden Gaffes and Quotes.

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“A lively composition! The various moneyed people, their elaborately appointed living quarters, and their high-wheeling lifestyle add a dash of pizzazz.” Kirkus Reviews

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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ENCHANTÉ – KATHRYN INTERVIEWS LU – Governor of Province America

Kathryn of OMAHA TV

“Welcome to the Mao Xi Jinping Tower, Ms. Kathryn,” says Lu Kung Si, Chinese Governor of Province America. “Look out to New Beijing,” he added proudly, pointing from his windows to the landscape of former New York City.

“Thanks, Mr. Lu,” Kathryn says. “Mars proposed to me on this building when it was still ours.”

“Please, sit down,” Lu says, ignoring Kathryn’s reference to better times for the U.S. “So, what can I do for you?”

“What are your plans for what you call ‘Province America’?”

“Province America will have semi-autonomous status,” Lu says. “But under Chinese rule of law, as I explained to your dear husband Mars last time.” (http://bit.ly/2Jvsfoq)

“But reports say America’s former economic boom has all but dissipated in the Province.”

“Not so,” Lu objects. “You forget that Province America’s economy is now mostly informal and not recorded in the government statistics and for good reason. No venture capitalism anymore.”

“But is that not a recognition that Chinese communism or socialism does not work?”

“How do you think China’s economy grew so fast that it beat the former U.S.A.?” Lu exclaims, vexed by Kathryn’s statement. “We apply our successful Communist Party’s mercantilism.”

“But is the slowing economy of Province America not due to the fact that China cannot steal the former U.S. technology anymore?” dares Kathryn.

“Ms. Kathryn,” warns Lu, “I hate to be impolite but the same rule I allow in interviews with Mars applies to you. One more impertinent question and I must order you out the door.”

“Let me rephrase the question then, Mr. Lu,” says Kathryn, unperturbed. “How come that the former innovative American mind does not produce the same results under Chinese dominance?”

“You are close to being thrown out the door, Ms. Kathryn. You may be a free resident of the State of Nebraska, but if you continue to disrespect China’s successful hegemony over Province America we shall have to reconsider the Xi Jinping-Buffett Convention.”

“We know that the Free State of Nebraska has become a thorn in the eye of your great President, Mr. Lu,” says Kathryn. “And you know that many of the great American companies that previously resided in what is now Province America have fled to my State, despite the Chinese Wall. Does that worry your Government?”

“Absolutely not. The previous economies of scale are simply not there anymore. The stock exchanges in New York are Chinese. All revenue is directed to the Chinese Treasury. Capital is made over there, not here. Buffett is aware.”

“But your great President wants his Buffett shares to flourish, no?” Kathryn asks, with a sly smile.

“We do not discuss the President’s musings, Ms. Kathryn,” Lu responds dryly. “Any more questions?”

“What are your plans with the former president of the U.S.? Will he continue to be imprisoned at Guantanamo Bay?”

“Yes, as will all of his collaborators, including the former First Lady. There’s enough room as we transported all previous Arab prisoners to Alcatraz. We  do not allow former disruptors of world peace to roam free in their countries of origin.”

“Thanks for that,” Kathryn says. “What about the Capitol, the former politicians? Will Province America still have elections for its local rulers?”

“There is only one Party now, the Socialist Democratic Party led by Bernie Sanders. They don’t rule but can use the Capitol for socialistic debates as before. No elections are needed. Bernie is socialist democratic enough and has been made Province of America’s Figurehead for Life, which at his age won’t be that long anyway. We will see what happens then.”

“Would Ms. Cortez succeed him?”

“I don’t think so. She is too toxic even for Chinese taste, even though the color of her lips represents the color of our flag.”

“But what about the other former politicians?”

“All non-socialist politicians are now in hard labor camps doing work for the first time in their life.” Lu chuckles.

“And what happened to the White House?”

“I thought a good journalist like you would have known that by now.” Lu flicks his hand, impatient.

“Well, I am asking for my audience,” Kathryn says, on the defensive.

“It’s being renovated as President Xi Jinping’s Eastern Residence for vacation.” Lu Kung Si seems hesitant in revealing this information.

“Would he rent out the Lincoln Bedroom?” ventures Kathryn, taking revenge.

“Watch your questions, Ms. Kathryn. President Xi Jinping is not as mercantile as some of your previous American Presidents or Secretaries of State who used public property for their personal pay for play schemes.” Lu smirked, contemptuously. “China is not corrupt. Your time is up, Ms. Kathryn. Come again.”

* * *

Relieved to fly back to Free Nebraska in her company plane, drinking Buffett beer, Kathryn files her report to Mars City TV. At Omaha TV she delivers it during the evening news. Back home, her secure cell phone rings. The screen announces, “Warren Buffett.”

“Well done,” he says. “We have a lot of border crossings from Province America. They’re digging tunnels to reach freedom. We’ve established a secure cyber link with Gitmo, but keep that for your self. We’re not giving up. Stay tuned.”

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“A beautiful story — full of suspense, drama, and enduring love centered around music. John Schwartz has created a whole world and a wonderful escape. The characters jump off the page with such personality and imagery that this book could make a great movie. Enchanting the Swan is a very enjoyable read, and I recommend it highly.” Neal Cary (Cellist -Professor – William&Mary)

“Enjoyed the book. Well written book. A very heartbreaking love story.” Vera Wilson

“Enchanting the Swan was a nice read, and a deviation from the predictable boy meets girl and falls in love formula. There were many turns in the book that are reminiscent of life in that they were off the path to the end result. The writing was very image evoking and it all made for a good story that kept me reading until the end. Looking forward to more from this author!” Amy

“A lively composition! The various moneyed people, their elaborately appointed living quarters, and their high-wheeling lifestyle add a dash of pizzazz.” Kirkus Reviews

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ENCHANTÉ – CHINA’S DEMOCRACY

Mars Man on Planet Earth and on Mars with Kathryn of Omaha TV

Mars Man is visiting Lu again for an interview on behalf of Mars TV at the Chinese America Office, formerly the Empire State Building, now called The Mao Xi Jinping Tower.

“Morning, Lu, how’s everything?”

“Province America is doing great, thanks to Bernie Sanders, now Chief Comrade of Province America, and Miss Cortez, Vice Chief Comrade. All schools are public now with free education, learning Mandarin as the first language. Healthcare is free. University is free and student loans are forgiven. Everyone has a fixed salary and nobody pays taxes as these are automatically withheld. All commerce and manufacturing is ‘Made in China’ and all revenues are paid into the Chinese Treasury.”

“My wife Kathryn says that her government salary is totally insufficient. I have to support her with Mars gold. The Yen does not have enough purchasing power she says.”

“Everyone’s salary is the same because everybody is equal. It’s about the same level as the old Social Security was. People have to learn how to live in a socialistic society. No jealousy, no keeping up with the Joneses. Bernie wanted that households with a maximum of two children up to eighteen years old get an extra allowance. We agreed to that, but that meant that the average salary had to be lower. All money is government money. Kathryn should be happy to receive money from China.”

“What happened to the money of the rich?”

“Chief Comrade Sanders said to confiscate their money because it was all stolen. So we did. Everybody has the same amount of money. Only the Leader determines who may have more.”

“Do citizens here still have freedom as embedded in the US Constitution?”

“You’re misinformed, Mars. The US Constitution is no more. The Founding Fathers are gone. Province America is ruled by the new Founding Fathers, Mao and Xi Jinping, with Bernie Sanders and Miss Cortez as their valets. Everyone is free within the confines of socialism.”

“What happened to President Trump and his military establishment?”

“President Trump made the mistake of visiting China with his top generals and political entourage to meet President Xi Jinping. They were incarcerated for unfriendly behavior about our legit American market share and shipped to Guantanamo Bay. China took over America with our superior Cyberwarfare equipment without firing one shot.”

“So you helped the American political left to achieve their goal of removing their rightfully elected President. Was there any collusion between you, Biden and Sanders?”

“Don’t ask impertinent questions, Mars. You know the rule. One more and you are out the door.”

“Sorry, Lu, but the former President was accused of collusion. Since you removed him from office in the interest of the left, the question arises. Back on the salary matter, if everyone has the same state salary, do people still have jobs?”

“In a planned economy, everyone has a job. The new State Districts of Province America assign jobs to them. The former states have been abolished. People living in each State District must register at the Xi Jinping Party Office. Those who do not will be imprisoned and they and their relatives forfeit their state salary.”

“But my wife says that her state salary cannot pay for needed groceries in the state commissaries.”

“In China, people have no problem buying in and living on state commissaries, so if we Chinese can, Chinese Americans can too. Most Americans are overweight anyway. Slimming down by living on a state salary is cheaper than paying exorbitant fees for Nutrisystem.”

“That’s tough on what used to be a freedom-loving society. Have there not been any protests?”

“No protests. Do you remember Tiananmen square?  President Xi dictated that everyone must closely adhere to the Communist Party line, or else. There are serious consequences if they don’t, such as life-long labor camps. So far, the inhabitants of Province America got the message.”

“Are people allowed to stay in their multimillion-dollar homes?” 

“Only true Chinese and true Chinese American collaborators can if they contribute to the Leader. Others must move out to make room for them. Chief Comrade Sanders and his pupil Miss Cortez are assigned McMansions of their liking. Miss Pelosi is holed up for free in an assistant-living residence managed by a state commissary.”

“Do South Americans still cross the border?”

“No, for two reasons. The Trump Wall now serves to prevent people from moving out. Second, Central American states are dominated by socialist regimes that closely collaborate with China. China does not tolerate migration.”

“Am I correct that China has destroyed Western democracy?”

“Your premise is wrong. Chinese democracy existed many centuries before Western nations were born. Who is to say that Western Democracy is better than Chinese Democracy? It’s all in the eyes of the beholder. China’s democracy has ruled a population grown to close 1.5 billion. How could you govern a population that large with Western Democracy? American democracy grew decadent with its sexual aberrations and political and religious infighting. Their politicians turned into a class of clowns. They dug their own grave. In a way, China has saved the Americans from themselves. Soon, we will save Mars from the Marsians.”

“I don’t think so, Lu. Our Cyber Power is still a multiple of China’s. I have no problem flying to and from Planet Earth in a jiffy. Mars Democracy is much older than China’s. Be careful, do not touch Mars or we focus our beams on Bejing and obliterate your system. Goodbye, Lu, it was a pleasure meeting you again.”

After kissing off Kathryn in Omaha, Mars Man scooted back to Mars. On the way, cybermalfare rattled the shield of Space Scooter One. Mars Man took his cell phone and dialed Lu. “Lu, stop that rattling right now or I pulverize your Xi Tower with my afterburner.” The rattling died right away.

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